Life has been... yeah, lately.

The Good:
I got into CCAD surprisingly easily; one meeting, one portfolio review, and I was accepted.
I got a new viola, who has yet to be named. I love her to death; she is positively beautiful.
Less than 50 days until I'm officially done with high school. Once I'm gone, I swear to god I'm going to be the most ecstatic person ever.
I bought my prom dress last week! It's a beautiful wine colour and is a little bit poofy, but not too much, and has this gorgeous rouching to make small star-like gathers across the skirt. It's perfect. AND less than $200.
I have an A in government. Oh, wow. o_____o; AND I haven't failed any math tests yet.
Work is going well. I really like it at Budget, though I do need to get some uber comfy shoes. I have a ton, but they start to lose their comfiness after the 3rd hour of standing.

The Bad:
Two days before my portfolio review [mind you, the most stressful day of my life ;_;], Jon broke up with me. Over two years, gone. Now I know what he meant by time positively wasted. All that effort, all those nights crying and aching, and just trying to be patient were for nothing at all. You don't know how betrayed I feel. Everything in my life is screwed up now, completely. I have to reevaluate everything I've ever wanted or dreamed about, because it's all suddenly gone. Every last bit of it, because his heart changed. And, the absolute worst part of it is that he can't even give me a reason why. It makes me feel like he was never really in it, and I wasted so much time being as good of a girlfriend as I could possibly be, while he was out lying to me, cheating on me, breaking every promise he's ever made, more or less, calling me names, and making me feel like shit. Now, I know I'm not perfect, but I tried so hard to be good, and all he ever did was call me selfish and needy and childish when I just wanted to talk to him. He yelled at me almost every time I cried, called me selfish when HE was the one out wasting our time, blowing money that was supposed to be, in essence, for his moving here, and hanging with his 'friends' and telling me they took precedent over me simply because they were there. Even though he had promised he would be home with me. And, you know what's the second worse thing about all of this? I still love him and want to be with him. After all he's done, after all he's hurt me and made me cry and want to die, I still love him and believe that he's making a mistake, and want to spend the rest of my life with him. It's not because I'm scared to be single or anything of the sort. And I just don't understand why he fell out of love with me. I don't get it; if anything, it should be me not in love with him anymore. I've never lied to him, cheated on him, broken promises to him, or anything. All I've done is insist that he spend time with me when he tells me he will. Would. Whatever.

Because I've been so just... heartbroken because of this, my grades have slipped dramatically. I have a D in economics; how is beyond me. A D in math, as well as in Anatomy, because I just haven't been doing work. I haven't had the motivation for anything.


Oh, well. >____<; I'll pick them all up soon.